Ten Things Guaranteed to Make Your Toddler Cry

1. It is time to wake up in the morning. Do not judge your toddler, as you were just complaining about having to wake up ten minutes ago when you violently hit your alarm.

2. It is time to get dressed. Let’s just agree that this is reasonable; pants are the worst.

3. It is time to go to daycare. How horrible it would be to be fed free snacks, color, play outside, and take a nap at your “job.”

4. It is time to be picked up from daycare. At some point during the day, a decision was made that the place is not horrible. You cannot say the same for your office.

5. It is dinner time. How dare you put anything but candy, cookies, or ice cream on that plate!

6. It is TV time. Why does The Land Before Time have to end? In 2019, there must be a way to play it on one continuous uninterrupted loop forever.

7. It is bath time. “No bath!”

8. It is time to get out of the bath. “Five more minutes!” Splash. Splash. Splash.

9. It is story time. Why have you only read six children’s books instead of the entire children’s section of the home library? What does it “being May” have to do with reading How The Grinch Stole Christmas?

10. It is bed time. “No night night!”


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